“A Sestina for Perseverance, Who Taught Me What Mars Sounds Like”
Phoebe Eis
What is the sound of parallel lines? A
scientist might know but I know every crease of my hand
like I know the mountains back home, how they cupped
me in their solidness, how far I could see from the cliff’s edge, looking over,
scanning blurred horizons for familiarity—your
Voice whipped away by the wind against my ear.
They are smaller than a grain of rice (The bones in your ear)
Without them you’re point A
and I'm point B, there is no line between us. Let's meet at your
place, somewhere between the hour hand and the minute hand.
Every hour they get to meet again, over
and over. Time is so much like water, you can't keep it cupped
Forever. There’s only so much blood. The doctor cupped
my chin and it made me cry when she tucked my hair behind my ear
just so and she didn’t say anything. When it was over
I said thank you and walked out. It costs a hundred dollars a
session just to have someone to listen. Just for someone to hand
you a tissue and send the prescription over to your
Pharmacy, when what you really need is someone to reach into your
chest, to find the epicenter of that ache, that writhing mess, to have it cupped
right out of you. That's what we mean when we say can someone give me a hand?
That's what we mean when we say can someone lend me an ear?
What we mean is a simple diagram: I’m line B and you’re line A.
We go on forever and we don’t know what to do about it. We move over
The horizon and only see more earth, more sky. I'm so over
this parallel existence! I don’t want it anymore, can it be your
turn now? How nice would it be to curl up between those lines, a
space just the right size, and rest. If I were in outer space and I cupped
my hands around my mouth and screamed, it would never reach your ear.
A sound is emptier than that soundlessness. Climb hand
Over hand into its vastness: there is no light. You can still put your hand
on your nose with your eyes closed. The body finds itself, even over
such distance. Maybe if I keep shouting, that sound will reach your ear
eventually. Maybe our lines will meet. Maybe orbiting the same star is enough, your
path solitary. We don't need to build rockets. Here we are cupped
Close by the atmosphere where the stars and planets wind around us: a
Miracle, if you believe in such things. God is reaching out a hand
to yours but they haven't touched yet, cupped chapel ceiling watching over,
Hymns still ringing in a seashell when you press it to your ear.